Nov 19, 2007

My New Favorite Blog, Jezebel

I have a confession to make. While writing this blog about celebrities and diet, at times I have fallen into a rut scrutinizing over minimal weight gain in the stars we see daily in our tabloids. My new favorite blog is Jezebel.com. I was first introduced to them when they released the untouched version of Faith Hill's cover of RedBook. Remember?


Well, it's kind of a women's fashion/gossip/odd news blog with a dark comedic effect (their tagline is Celebrity, Sex, Fashion without the airbrushing). One of their regular featured articles is called Missdemeanors. The website claims to monitor some of the web's most popular blogs and issue a virtual spanking against those who commit "Crimes against Womanity." Here is the first violation from this Friday's posting:

The Charge: Rampant Hypocrisy
The Accused: "Wah, wah, they're being mean to me and my little innocent blog!" whiner Rian from The Skinny. How's it feel to finally get picked first for something?
The Evidence: "Hayden Panettiere has been photographed leaving the gym nearly every day lately. Here are some new pictures from this past Friday...And, the obligatory cellulite photo."
Points for Good Behavior: None. So over this chick and her dumb blog and her own weight loss "journey." which is clearly f'ed up. Hayden However-You-Spell-Her-Last-Name is like Olsen-sized and totally cute and there's no such thing as "an obligatory cellulite photo" unless you are a fat-obsessed asshat who spends her days analyzing the tiny weight fluctuations of celebrities. You know what those tiny fluctuations are, Rian? Bowel movements. Try it.
The Sentence: Participating in a mayonnaise eating competition.

[jezebel.com]

I used to go to The Skinny a lot to write this blog, but after awhile, I got so sick and tired of the same old picture of Jessica Simpson asking if she had gained a pound or two, it was ridiculous and I suddenly started to hate writing this blog. That was when I discovered Jezebel. The ladies who continually crack me up helped me see the light at the end of "The Skinny" tunnel. This lady is crazy. I will do my best not to use her site for Diet.com blogs, mainly because we PROMOTE healthy lifestyles and clearly this woman, Rian, does not given her scrutinizing blogs over a pound or two. Celebrities are human too.

Here is a second violation they discuss:
The Charge: Fat-ernizing
The Accused: Basically bland Nick from Celeb Slam.
The Evidence: "Man, Bill Gates played this all wrong. Don't get me wrong, if I was as rich as him, I'd have gone to the concert, too. But at the end of the show I would have presented Kelly with a beautiful gift basket full of candy and pastries. I might have even taken her for a night out on the town, wining and dining her at one of Seattle's finest restaurants. On me of course. And then the next day I would have bought her production company and fired her for being fat."
Points for Good Behavior: In general, Celeb Slam is fairly link and boob-photo heavy and therefore about as offensive as an issue of Maxim. Like, it goes without saying that the standards for "fat" by which women are judged is totally different from the ones for men. But jokes about Kelly Clarkson being fat are boring and stupid. Wait, actually, jokes about any woman being fat are boring and stupid. But with Kelly Clarkson, it's like, you can almost see her rolling her eyes. Like, maybe once upon a time your insult would drive me to the Little Debbie aisle. Like when I was twelve.
The Sentence: Pretty sure being boring and predictable is punishment enough.

This pretty much explains itself, but I just wanted to show why I enjoy this site. They also have actual news, and break it themselves instead of just copying what the real news is saying like most bloggers.

Here is an example of another story from last week. The headline reads "Annals of Anorexia: As Suspected The Models Aren't Eating." During fashion week in New York, one model granted the New Yorker access to her food diary that she kept specifically for the article. The model tries to look like she eats a lot, but Jezebel, decodes her diary by calculating the amount of calories she consumes and concludes that the model is barely eating 800 calories a day. I have some issue with this article because the model does not really state her portion sizes so Jezebel has guessed for her, making their calorie total susceptible to a VERY large margin of error. Here is a quote from the model with Jezebel's break down:
I had Raisin Bran for breakfast. I usually don't like eating first thing in the morning. For lunch I had a huge plate of green salad and vegetables. For dinner I had chicken noodle soup and a honey-and-oat bar from room service. I don't like cooking because you cook too much and the food gets wasted.

Raisin Bran - 195 (1 cup)
Milk - 85 (1 cup, skim)
Salad - 16 (4 cups lettuce)
Vegetables - 20 (1/2 cup asparagus)
Chicken noodle soup - 95 (i bowl)
Granola bar - 397 (1 bar)
Total for day: 808 calories

I don't know about you but A. I never actually have 1 cup of cereal OR soup, and B. I have never had a granola bar that was almost 400 calories. I would like to know where Jezebel got this nutrition data, and invite them to use Diet.com's. I agree the model hardly ate this day, and tries to appear that she indeed indulges but I would say that the bloggers should probably steer clear of this type of analysis in the future because it really has very little merit. BUT I do love this site, so thank you Jezebel.com for letting me openly hate on The Skinny and other weight scrutinizing bloggers :) Was that just hypocritical?

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